月光下的V8

在高中后两年的日子,我特别喜欢去图书馆呆着,尤其是当乌云密布在秋衣正浓却满是绿意的adams field上,我坐在巨大无比的落地窗前那个独个儿座椅上。我喜欢把那个侧门开着,任风将落叶扫进室内;要是Ash村正磅礴大雨那更是甚好,任雨点夹杂着泥土香气飘进,伴奏着我一个又一个不转过身的下午。

只要冬雪融化,我们图书馆前的铁桌子椅子就会被搬出来。我可能是全校唯一一个在那里日日搞作业的人。三桌儿还是四桌儿,我记不太清了,密密红砖中,我四仰八叉,纸和头发在风中凌乱。是我,总是我,还是我,那就是我的天地;除了我,半个人影都没有。

我好像也从来没有在意过从gym yoga room的落地窗那里能不能看到那地儿,毕竟那块是个大平地,我想晚上在灯光下坐在那里的人可能还比较容易被发现。总之我是常常去那个地方,除了后山 cemetery,那里便是我的 horizon – 在无数个月色不好或正好的周五周六夜晚,我兜里揣上三、四罐V8, 去那里躺尸。

在月下可以念书,可以听蝉声,还可以就那样翘着脚坐着,咂V8。V8是个什么味儿呢?我觉得是好似令人如痴如醉的冷掉罗宋汤的味道。罗宋汤味不用解释,就问酒味是tm怎么喝出来的 – 就是那薄厚刚好的铝罐! 不得了的,真的不得了的,在那样买醉犯法的年龄,手里能拿一个慷慨激昂的罐子,猛灌几口,酒精味也就出来了。

那里虽说挨着草地,却好似没有什么咬人的虫子。不过若非好天气,咱经常还是严严实实的,也咬不着。在那里睡一觉也是舒服的,毕竟诺大的世界就像只有你和你头上的灯光,世界都是你的。

我那些年的agency就是在那样的日子里,从地里舒展着长出来的,因为那样空旷和亲密的平衡,那样的空间,那样的自由,是我至今人格里、坦荡的最深处,闭眼就能浮现的归宿。

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